Recently, I shared how my occasional insomnia has taught me to listen to what my body, mind, and spirit are telling me…am I anxious, excited, or just plain rundown? And this weekend I was able to put that into practice.
While I didn’t have much trouble falling asleep, I did find myself awake before 7am on both Saturday and Sunday, unable to lull myself back into unconsciousness. As I lay awake at 6:30am on a day when I supposedly “should” be getting more sleep, I realized I didn’t feel frustrated by my wide eyes and alert mind – I felt invigorated and excited for the day ahead.
You see, on Saturday, I woke up full of ideas: ideas for books and blog posts, stories I want to share with you – with others. Later that day, I was to meet up with a friend in the publishing business, and I felt like a kid on Christmas morning. I couldn’t sleep; I was just too excited to unwrap the presents that the day had in store. In that moment, I realized that my inability to sleep is not always a negative effect of anxiousness or worry. Sometimes it’s just part of the unique way God has made me: imaginative, thoughtful, action-oriented. A writer.
Living into that identity as a writer means embracing even the inconvenient parts of it, including sometimes getting less sleep or getting stuck in my head until I can get the words out on a page. It requires persistence and being observant of what’s happening around me and within me.
But that also means I get to enjoy the process of discovering more about who I am and what God is doing in the world. And while words don’t always come easy, I almost always enjoy the process of sitting down to write since it makes me more attune to all my senses.
Even on Saturday, as I sat cross-legged on my bed and wrote, I occasionally just paused and enjoyed my surroundings. The candles flickering on my bookshelf, filling my room with the scents of lilies and citrus. The sound of Sigur Rós in the background – a perfectly complementary, non-distracting soundtrack to my writing. The taste of my strong coffee (cream, no sugar) and the chocolate ginger chia pudding I prepared the night before in anticipation of a leisurely Saturday morning. The cool smoothness of the pudding was a perfect counterpart to the crunch of the cacao nibs I had sprinkled on top, and I savored every bite. Even the fog outside my window felt comforting and cozy on that morning. From where I sat looking out the window, the fog almost seemed peaceful, the dense clouds blanketing the city and resting on the still sleeping houses, slowly pulling back as the residents began to stir.
Beyond the enjoyment of the actual writing process, I’m grateful that I get to share
my God’s stories with you. Because if I just keep them to myself, what good does it do anyone?
So, I’m excited to let you in on a secret: I’m starting my first book, and I want you to be part of the process. I’ll be sharing more about the concept soon and will ask you a few questions along the way to ensure what I’m writing is useful and encouraging to you. In the meantime, I’d just ask you this: Would you pray for me? Would you hold me before God and hold me accountable to actually finishing this work? Would you ask God to give me wisdom, vulnerability, and joy in the process?
I would be so grateful. And if I can ever be praying for you, drop me a line and let me know.